So the past few days have been kinda crappy. It stinks when the inspiration runs out, the revelations silence, and it feels like I'm right back where I started. I have no profound thoughts or views to offer. Just the everyday, mundane of the walk. When the excitement wears off, when there is silence, it makes this road feel that much more lonely. I don't feel abandoned this time around though. And I'm not angry anymore. I'm still making an effort to stay on the path; but maybe I'm not doing enough. Maybe my focus is off. All too often we get so excited to be back where Yahweh wants us, and we are reminded of His promises to us. It's all too easy to shift our focus back onto those promises. I know I have that problem all the time.
I'm still not out of the dry barren wasteland, but at least I'm walking and not camped out there. I'm exhausted though. I'm weary with the same sights everyday. I'm ready for a change. The problem with having been in the desert so long is that you lose sight of the Promised Land. It's hard to believe it even exists anymore. It's hard to believe that all those things Yahweh promised will ever come to pass. I know I have been struggling with my disbelief lately. Yet, even in my disbelief, I'm still pursuing those things. That's the problem. We get our sights set on the gift than the Giver, even when we have lost hope of the gift. Does that make sense?
So... those are my mundane ramblings for the day. I wish things were back where they were a week ago. But it's time to stop looking backward and start looking forward. :)
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